Peace and Blessings

We were sitting in the food court at Penn Square Mall, which is something I hate doing due to lack of cleanliness and the fact that I usually end up watching the food roll around in people's mouths. Attractive. It's a good place to people-watch sometimes, though. You could compare it to sitting in one of those old-fashioned hair dryers and pretending to read People Magazine while you hear about Jenny's date on Saturday with the average-looking guy from Marketing. The equally entertaining but generally easier option is the food court. I was enjoying my luke-warm Chick-fil-a when my mom, with tears in her eyes, said, "See that man over there (points)? He works in the shoe department at Macy's and every time I see him, I just get so sad. I wonder if he's alone." Keep in mind that my mother cries often -- I think it has to do with aging but the fact that a Macy's clerk was making her cry wasn't so abnormal.

Later that day, we saw him working the shoe department and being super polite and helpful, etc. My mind continued to linger on that curiosity. Does he have kids? What does he do on Friday nights if he's by himself? Because loneliness is something that everyone struggles with from time to time. I wondered what it would be like to be 60+ and, knowing that you're on the downhill side of life's timeline, be looking at the finality of death without anyone standing next to you. That's a harsh reality if you think about it.

I found out today that my pawpaw has a mass on one of his lungs. Keep in mind that this man is one of the most precious people created by God. It's easy to say in times of fear or loss or grief or anxiousness that someone is/was "one of the most influential people in your life." But please know that this man competes for the title of Most Influential Person in Courtney's Life, and probably wins most days. I know that God tries to teach me lessons that I sometimes ignore; but I'm confident that my grandpa speaks to me through a God that is using him to reach me. Because there are few people whose words I revere so highly. Now we don't know if the mass is benign or malignant -- at this point, I'm not filled with worry -- because he hasn't even had a biopsy yet. He's so upbeat and at peace and I know that whatever lies in store for us, I feel blessed to know such a brilliant and beautiful soul.

I hope you, whoever you are, are acutely aware of those blessings disguised as people. Our bodies are merely houses for the souls that we love, which is a strange and scary and vulnerable thing; but a reality that we are forced to adapt and submit to.