Paradise

My heart is breaking a little more every day. The students are starting to trickle away -- the first of us left earlier this afternoon. Two of my favorites are leaving Thursday morning and I'm just at a loss of what I'm supposed to say exactly. 

Chloe turned 15 on Saturday, which is a little surreal for me considering that I remember the day she was born. Every time I blink she's a different person and I've had a hard time reconciling the fact that I missed an entire semester of her life. In my guilt, I made her a video that was not only fun to make, but fun to share:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CI8ol0e4nIk&feature=results_video&lr=1&ob=0

This last weekend was our trip to Sorrento/Capri/Pompeii. We started in Pompeii and listened while Kirk lectured for what felt like forever. We learned a lot and enjoyed our time there but were itching for some beach. We all stayed at the same hostel, which ended up being a campsite. We had 3-man cabins and all stayed in the same little village. So ensued the title Camp Arezzo, which none of us can think of without getting a little bit misty. 

Saturday we went to Capri and took in all the beauty around us. All I kept thinking when I saw the island was that it looked like the island on King Kong. I expected palm trees and beachy weather and outfits but it was a totally different kind of island experience. Most of the time, it just felt like I was on the coast of the mainland. We went through the city in the three tiers: the port, Capri, and Anacapri. As you go farther up the hill, the island becomes less commercial. We spent the day shopping and eating. BUT the best part of the day was when we went to the small beach. It's the beginning of May so the water is ice cold. I told my friends that there was no way I was leaving without jump straight into the Mediterranean. So I did, and it was colllld. By the end, everyone was jumping into the ocean in their clothes. We were so, so happy!

The whole weekend went by really quickly and we were all dreading going back home because Kirk's paper was coming up. I chose to do mine over Michelangelo's Last Judgment. It's not that the subject matter was difficult -- it's probably the easiest topic to find information on. It's just that the paper was supposed to be 7 pages and 1 and a half spacing. I thought I was supposed to be studying abroad, aka traveling?? We've all been super stressed about it all and we had our Italian language final on Tuesday. Which is a perfect segue into my next topic....

Monday was my 21st birthday! As previously mentioned, we were so stressed with finals that my entire birthday was spent working on Kirk's paper. We had a meeting that morning and my friends showed up with a pastry with candles in it and a cappuccino. That night, they all bought my dinner and brought me wine. We waited until today to celebrate though since we were all done with our papers. My friends and I had a potluck picnic in Cortona. We had pecorino cheeses, grapes, strawberries, bread, champagne and bruschetta! We were so full that we were falling asleep. A couple of us ended up buying new leather purses before heading back to Arezzo. 

Tonight we met at the Marco Perennio apartment for a dinner of mussels and pasta. We all just sat around playing music and being reminiscent. I have never been more scared to lose a group of people in my life. I just want time to stop right now. I love these people -- they have become such a part of my life journey. Have I already told you how much my heart is breaking? I think that's the way it's supposed to be, though. I'm supposed to fall in love with this place and my friends. I'm supposed to be sick about leaving. It's the sign that I did what I came here to do. I hope that everyone I know experiences something that changes them so greatly.

My heart is sinking as I'm lifting up above the clouds away from you

I can't believe I'm leaving, I don't know what I'm going to do

But someday, I will find my way back to where your name is written in the sand

'Cause I remember every sunset

I remember every word you said

We were never going to say goodbye

Tell me how to get back to paradise with you

And I'll be there in a heartbeat

Alive

Danielle and I took a little day trip to Pisa and Lucca on Saturday. The famous leaning tower is . . . still leaning. Surprise, surprise. We walked through the city, which is quaint and small. Their Duomo was beautiful and the Baptistery had a ten-second echo, which was really impressive. The security guard comes out every 30 minutes and sings for about 2 minutes. By the time she sings a scale, she's creating harmony with her voice(s). We caught the train over to Lucca and rode bikes along the city walls. We had lunch at a charming pizza place, sipped wine and watched a ridiculous break-dancing competition. The weather broke 80 degrees, which is impressive, I assure you, seeing as how it poured rain again all today. It was the best day and I told Danielle that when my birthday is going on and we're too busy working on finals, I would be willing to call that my birthday. It was just one of those days. I was happy.

 I'm getting this tightness in my chest. I'm moved to tears every time I think of leaving this beautiful place and the beautiful people that I've grown to love. I've gained more than just pounds and a love for carbs, believe me. I've gained a world view, a love of being amazed, a love of meeting people I can connect with on some seemingly insignificant level. I have had my moments that made my heart ached for parts of home, but now I'm having moments that I just ache to think of saying goodbye. I have 12 days and I keep doing the math in my head: by the time I subtract this weekend's travel (3 days), homework/final exams (3 days) and packing and cleaning my apartment for departure, I'm left with absolutely no time. Nothing is more devastating than knowing that it may be a very long time before I breathe Tuscan air.

I've found that I have an irresistible urge to do big things. I want to see it all and do it all. I want to see the castles of Germany, ski in the Alps, ride a camel in Turkey, see an elephant in India, sing with children in Africa. Is that wrong? It's kind of an expensive hobby, isn't it? I have seen only a small tease of the many wonders of God and I know there's more. I've seen things that can't be bought or sold, only felt; and I want nothing more than to feel them. It's not just a travel bug or an itch for adventure, it's want I want to do with my life. And I'm determined.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”